Kim wishes anyone else was here now instead of her. Audrey, her mom, even Tony would be able to handle this better, they'd know how to get through to him, they wouldn't be so paralyzed at the sight of his scars, and they'd be less afraid of losing him forever. She looks toward the wall, half-hoping that one of them would appear, but there's no one and she has to make a choice.
She gazes at her drink through watery eyes and takes a small sip, almost gagging on the alcohol but managing to swallow after a moment. She owes her dad more than getting drunk. She pushed him away, at the time that felt like the right decision, but seeing him in that state...maybe one more drink wouldn't hurt - no, she promised Barry and he told her that alcohol and sleeping pills weren't the answer.
Then again, Barry had never seen someone he loved tortured or the look of panic in her dad's eyes or the visible scars on his hand or known that he was to blame for the wariness and distance. She holds her hand against her cheek, after that moment she didn't think she'd see her dad again, and only by telling herself it would hurt less in the end was she able to keep from clinging to him. She already mourned him, her psyche wouldn't take another blow, but after getting that phone call, it was hard to keep him in the past. Turning away from him once was hard enough, but she had been strengthened by anger and righteousness and the situation had proved that she'd been right; he brought nothing but danger and heartache. She can't hold onto those feelings now, they're slipping away, and she's powerless against her instincts. It's one thing to write off someone who is free and okay but not part of your life anymore, it's another to know that they're being held and tortured and when they die you'll never know.
Now that she's seen him, he's real again, and she can't make herself walk away. Perhaps she'll never be able to leave him again - it is out of her hands, he appeared here, he needs her and confirmed every fear she's been living with for over half a year. She's finding it almost impossible to stay angry with someone who looks so lost, who won't even trust doctors, who stared at her without any defenses and kept tensing and waiting for her to hurt him. The realization hits her that this is what he disappeared to keep from happening, and it's hard to blame anyone for choosing to run away rather than facing that fate. She's hurt he didn't tell her, but knowing the enemy he's facing, she can even understand that a little. Four people knew and three are dead.
She waits until her tears have dried and she's calmed down before standing up again and makes her way over to the bar. She asks Bar for a few things and soon has food and a deluxe portable first aid kit. Armed with these tools, she goes upstairs to her room and knocks softly on the door.
no subject
She gazes at her drink through watery eyes and takes a small sip, almost gagging on the alcohol but managing to swallow after a moment. She owes her dad more than getting drunk. She pushed him away, at the time that felt like the right decision, but seeing him in that state...maybe one more drink wouldn't hurt - no, she promised Barry and he told her that alcohol and sleeping pills weren't the answer.
Then again, Barry had never seen someone he loved tortured or the look of panic in her dad's eyes or the visible scars on his hand or known that he was to blame for the wariness and distance. She holds her hand against her cheek, after that moment she didn't think she'd see her dad again, and only by telling herself it would hurt less in the end was she able to keep from clinging to him. She already mourned him, her psyche wouldn't take another blow, but after getting that phone call, it was hard to keep him in the past. Turning away from him once was hard enough, but she had been strengthened by anger and righteousness and the situation had proved that she'd been right; he brought nothing but danger and heartache. She can't hold onto those feelings now, they're slipping away, and she's powerless against her instincts. It's one thing to write off someone who is free and okay but not part of your life anymore, it's another to know that they're being held and tortured and when they die you'll never know.
Now that she's seen him, he's real again, and she can't make herself walk away. Perhaps she'll never be able to leave him again - it is out of her hands, he appeared here, he needs her and confirmed every fear she's been living with for over half a year. She's finding it almost impossible to stay angry with someone who looks so lost, who won't even trust doctors, who stared at her without any defenses and kept tensing and waiting for her to hurt him. The realization hits her that this is what he disappeared to keep from happening, and it's hard to blame anyone for choosing to run away rather than facing that fate. She's hurt he didn't tell her, but knowing the enemy he's facing, she can even understand that a little. Four people knew and three are dead.
She waits until her tears have dried and she's calmed down before standing up again and makes her way over to the bar. She asks Bar for a few things and soon has food and a deluxe portable first aid kit. Armed with these tools, she goes upstairs to her room and knocks softly on the door.