agirllost | (no subject)

She wakes up and is alone. But that doesn't cause her any fear, she sometimes prefers being alone now. At least, if she's alone she doesn't have to think or try to figure out what's real. She can just lie in bed and pretend the rest of the world doesn't exist.

A small part of her knows that she should *not* feel that way, that curling up in her room is not a way to deal with problems and that for most of the people in the bar she only has one set of memories, but she doesn't know how much longer she can take her dreams. She meant what she said to Chris, having no memories would make things so much easier.

And she wouldn't have the nightmares anymore, the blood-soaked visions she can't escape, because she remembers standing in the supermarket and how the person behind her suddenly screamed and grabbed their nose. They were hemorrhaging and then other people followed suit, the virus spreading like wildfire.

Kim is immune and she pictures trying to help the woman and whoever else was hurting and the CDC arriving fast and waiting for her test results as she sat with her back against the customer service cage.

Then, other calls began pouring in and when she was finally free to go, that's when the men came to her door.

But part of her remembers none of that happening at all.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I'm not sure, I don't know who can."

She looks up at him, "Can you find out for me?"

He closes his eyes, wishing there were some other way. But he knows as well as she does that there isn't.

"Yeah," he whispers. "I'll find someone who can do it for you."

[OOC: Will this actually be part of the Kim-plot? If so, should Chase actually look for someone with memory-erasing powers at some point? And if so, did you have anyone specific in mind?]

[ooc: um, kind of? There's another plan for the memory thing (secret) but yes, Chase could ask around.]

"Thank you. I...I want to look at you and only see you, not...whatever else I see."

[OOC: Okay. Maybe I'll have him just read up on various forms of magical memory modification and not actually go looking for someone to do it yet.]

He doesn't know what to say to that. He swallows around the rising lump in his throat and gently touches her shoulder. "I just want you to be happy again. I can't stand seeing you unhappy."

[ooc: aww, Chase. That's a good idea since I'm not sure what's going to happen exactly but it probably won't be necessary.]

"I know that my memories are hurting more than just me...they're hurting you too."

She touches the hand on her shoulder.

[OOC: Well, partly because it’ll be relevant to him too, later on. And it’s also partly because I want an excuse to make him read Harry Potter. *grin*]

“Don’t worry about hurting me,” he whispers, gently stroking the back of her hand with his thumb. “I just want you to be sure it’s what you want to do.”

[ooc: Hee. I just SAW. Sorry, was at work all day.]

"I can't think of anything else *to* do. When I try to write it out...it...it just doesn't make sense.

[OOC: No problem. Chase hasn't been around at all for two days because I've had so much homework. :)]

"I know you've put a lot of thought into it."

He trusts her. He's just afraid of letting anyone use magic like that on someone he cares about, and he's not letting himself think of the consequences if it backfired somehow.

[ooc: well also my brain = DEAD from canon and stuff]

She nods and bites her lip.

[OOC: I'm having sort of a delayed reaction to canon. I hated it last night and wanted to go smack Joel Surnow upside the head, but now that I think about it, I'm liking it more and more.]

He's a little lost in thought, wondering what exactly he's going to do about this.

He snaps out of it, for the moment. It's not the time to be worrying about it.

"Is there anything else you've been thinking about?"

[ooc: I really need to watch it again but yeah if they just haev him back at CTU next season I'll be, wtf, but they said this would change things forever...well it certainly does.]

"How he could have done it. I thought...I thought I knew him."

[OOC: I'm dying to see what they're going to do with S5. I really want to see who comes back, if anyone...and what Jack's new identity is and everything, and how Kim and Chase handle it (though knowing TPTB, they probably won't even mention our pups all damn season. *sigh*)]

Chase isn't sure who exactly she's talking about, but he can understand the sentiment. "I don't know how any of it could have happened," he says quietly.

[OOC: Don't they realize that I watch this show for family connections!? Dammit. Me too, I can't imagine what they'll do but they're actually planning it this time *shocked*]

"He...," she closes her eyes. "I didn't think he'd let people die for money."