agirllost: (lookingin//kellslawels)
agirllost ([personal profile] agirllost) wrote2007-01-05 01:59 am
Entry tags:

And home again

May 7, 2012
Night

Kim walks into the living room, dropping her briefcase and pulling off her jacket. She throws it on a chair, figuring she'll pick it up later, and sits down on the couch, listening for signs of life.

Chase is either asleep or busy and she leans back, feeling her eyes start to close. Long day and more stressful than tiring. At least she didn't feel Behrooz's anxiety about CTU or have his fears compound hers.

She's also learned things she wishes she didn't know. She can still remember how it felt to be watched.

Her fingers undo the first two buttons of her blouse and she slips off her shoes, resisting the urge to lie down and wake up tomorrow morning. At least she's home and everything's calm.

A few days earlier she'd picked up the developed film from her dad's first few weeks back in LA. Slitting her eyes open, she sees the pictures and gently picks up the top one. She sits up a little more and examines the photo.

Dinner had been after Angie's bed time, but she still wanted to stay up and spend time with Grampa and Aunt Chris. Before carrying her off to bed, Kim had snapped a picture of her on the couch with them.

She can never bring this picture to work or let them see it or even talk about the time she spends with her family.

Kim's found herself telling so many half-truths and that's only counting the facts that sound plausible. Carrie had been diplomatic in questioning, but she knew the unspoken motives and that a lot worse than 'not okay' had probably been rumored. She wonders if Chris has heard the whispers and how she manges to keep quiet.

Some day the truth will have to come out and she only hopes that everyone can forgive them.

Her thoughts are interrupted by the sound of footsteps behind her - but she knows the pace and weight of these steps.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-05 07:03 am (UTC)(link)
Chase leans over the back of the couch, smiling a little at the picture, and rubs her shoulders.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-05 07:13 am (UTC)(link)
He kisses her cheek. "So your first day was pretty good?"

He lets go of her shoulders long enough to sit down next to her and wraps his arm around her again.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-05 07:25 am (UTC)(link)
"I was debating...I didn't want to make her go to bed early, 'cause she wanted to stay up and give you a hug, but she was tired out from her field trip this morning and getting really cranky." The joys of parenting a four-year-old.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-05 07:34 am (UTC)(link)
He smiles a little. "She was all excited about it when we got home. I think they went on a creekwalk and she caught one of those water-strider things..."

As nice as it is to be able to pick his daughter up from school every day, he feels like shit being cooped up in the house instead of at work.

"How's Chloe doing?"

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-05 07:45 am (UTC)(link)
Chase wonders what they had to bribe Chloe with to get her to take a day off.

"Yeah, I actually talked to him earlier today. I, uh, have a final interview on Friday." The job's looking like a lock, which is immensely comforting, but he's still going to be awfully antsy until he's actually walking back into the CTU building.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-05 07:56 am (UTC)(link)
"Ah--" He raises a finger. "Don't go there."

The warning is playful, but he doesn't want her feeling self-deprecating. He knows she's a good agent. As freaked as he'd been when she'd gone undercover, she'd pulled it off amazingly.

His arm tightens around her a little.

"I'm proud of you." His smile is almost shy.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-06 04:14 am (UTC)(link)
He exhales thoughtfully.

"What do you mean?"

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-06 04:26 am (UTC)(link)
God, people are so fucking stupid.

"The hell with them," he murmurs, scooting closer. "They don't know what you've been through and what makes going back important to you. Yeah, I guess they might be a little surprised, but, y'know...they can just goddamn deal and they'll get over it in a couple of days. If you want to be at CTU, you belong there. And you are a good agent."

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-06 04:44 am (UTC)(link)
"You have access to their personnel files. You can dig up all the dirt you want; you'll know all about them in no time." He lips quirk a little.

"No, but seriously. I know...it's gonna be weird for a while." He sighs. He can understand her consternation.

"After what happened when we worked there before...I figure...they'll have heard all the rumors about Jack and his being kinda unorthodox, and that's probably what's making them wary, but you know, they're also going to have heard about that Jane Saunders mission. They've already got to be impressed with you, Kim. Once you've been back for a little bit, they're not going to be wary anymore, but they're still gonna be impressed."

Maybe a little of that is projection. He can't imagine anyone not being impressed. But that's him.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
"And they never will know. It's none of their damn business."

It hurts because Kim has a point, because as far as Chase is concerned, they have no right to look at her like that, but he can understand why they do.

"They just don't know, Kim. It's not even their fault, they just...don't have the capacity to understand. You just have to rise above it. It doesn't matter what they think. You're not there to replace Jack or to share secrets with them; you're there to do a job you're good at, and eventually everyone's going to realize that and quit staring at you. They'll get over it. It'll just take a while."

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 05:23 am (UTC)(link)
"You kidding?" Chase looks at her. "I fell for you before I even met Jack face-to-face."

'Taken a shine to her' is how his boss had put it, and he'd been embarrassed by how obvious his crush on Kim had been, but when she'd smiled at him, he really hadn't cared what the other men had thought.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 05:42 am (UTC)(link)
"I'd have been a little wary," he confesses. "Still wouldn't have stopped me from asking you out, though." After all, he'd started working for Jack long before working up the courage to make a move.

He rubs his eyes. This is what he's worried about--this is why he quit field work in the first place. Why he quite working for CTU entirely.

"We're not field agents, Kim," he says quietly. "And we can't stay away from CTU. Not really. Staying away from the field is the best we can do, and that should be enough to keep Angie safe. I wouldn't do it if it weren't."

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 06:14 am (UTC)(link)
All he can do is nod. They all know that feeling, anyone who's ever worked for CTU. There's no way to quit or run away.

He just holds her closer and exhales.

"I know, baby."

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 06:46 am (UTC)(link)
"They're gonna stop asking after a while," he promises. It's all he can offer.

"...I don't really know how any of us do it," he murmurs, holding her hand in his. And he wonders sometimes why it's getting progressively harder to really want to interact with people outside their small circle. Who else would understand?

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 07:12 am (UTC)(link)
"Yeah, it was hard enough when we were just dating." He shakes his head, remembering the few stolen makeout sessions in the tech room.

He turns to brush his lips against her cheek. "We kind of sucked at hiding it, didn't we?"

His hand closes discreetly around the ring in his pocket.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_righthandman_/ 2007-01-07 07:29 am (UTC)(link)
"If I have my way," he says, with a hint of a smile--because this is one of this the few things they really still have to smile about, "everyone'll know."

He slides the ring gently onto her finger.