agirllost | (no subject)

Kim hears her and feels her holding her hand. She has no idea what's going on but Elaine seems to know what's happening.

"These...they contain my memories?"

"Yes...right now, we're outside of them. Now, you will be able to look at them, and know which ones do not belong to you, to this you."

"How...how do I know that?"

"Let us look over where the papers are spilled out. We can see if there are differences between these and the memories that do not cause you pain."

They go over to where the two filing cabinets are turned over. Both have four drawers, and the top two in each one are opened and spilled out.

Elaine picks up some manila folders. Some are edged in black, others in green. "Let us look into the closed drawers...we can see if the ones that are not mixed up are all of a certain color."

She nods, but is a little wary. No, more than wary, kind of freaked out that she's holding her *memories* in her hands.

"But if I touch the closed drawers, could't I mess them up too?"

"Not if we do not remove any of them." Somehow, Elaine just knows this.

She helps Kim straighten up the filing cabinets and place the two next to each other.

The two women pick up the files carefully, putting them into two piles, one of green-edged folders, and the other of black-edged folders. "Kim...relax. Relax, everything will be all right." Her gentle voice holds utter confidence and no doubt at all.

Kim realizes her hands are shaking, she can't help it. "Okay, I'll...I'll open it."

She walks a few feet down to another cabinet and pulls the drawer open. "They're black."

"That means those are the ones we must take care in filing in one of these two cabinets."

Elaine opens up the bottom drawers of the end cabinet. "These are green."

She opens up the other one. "And these are black. This is the one with the memories that are true, and we must file these mixed up ones very carefully."

She nods, staring at the folders, "Green. Like the virus."

"Aye, Kim. You take care with the black files. I'll deal with these green. They're numbered, I believe, and we can put them in order before putting them away."

Very carefully, Elaine sets about putting Kim's false memories in order and placing them in the filing cabinet.

She's reluctant to actually touch them. But, she can do this - she has to. And looking at Elaine's calm face she's not as afraid.

She picks up a file and...

In a parking lot and talking to dad and asking him about someone's death and I knew it was necessary but I don't know how I feel about the choice but they had to go because they'd gotten a lead on the virus...

She blinks and places the file in a drawer.

They work together, in silence, while they put Kim's disjointed and confused memories in order.

"Are you well, Kim?" she asks, about midway through the task.

Saunders has been shot and everyone's scrambling to find that last courier and Chase oh God Chase and his hand -- his...

"As...well as I can be."

Elaine nods. "It's going to be all right, Kim," she says quietly, and goes on carefully putting things away.

On the phone to Chase and I'm so scared for him and dad's been taken by Salazar and Chase is going to rescue him and he makes me promise not to say anything...

Kim nods and keeps going.

Elaine is careful. She thinks about her own memory library of trees and river, and of the black mangled tree beneath the waters where Dream placed the nightmares Nyaralothep had given her--still accessible upon occasion (and upon occasion, still coming to her in dreams), but seperated from herself.

She has known madness, and would not wish that upon another living creature.

Kim keeps going, putting things in order.

Listening to a phone call and they're trying to tell Chase how her dad hadn't really let Salazar out, that this was a sting and that he was endangering it.

She almost drops the file.

Elaine sees her fumble and looks over at her. "Kim? Is something wrong?"

She looks at Elaine with wide eyes, "I...I know what happened." And her other memories of talking to Chase at Milliways flood back and then she knows.

"Things are becoming clearer to you?" Elaine is quite pleased.

"I...oh God, Meg was right, I shouldn't have told him..."

Elaine comes over to Kim and puts a hand on her arm. "Whatever it is, we can fix later...but you cannot change what is done. We can work to solve the problem after we've accomplished what we need to now."

Elaine can feel herself beginning to tire, and though her eyes are closed as she sits on the bed and she is relaxed for the most part, her brows are knitted together and she just might be breaking a sweat.

She nods, 'Fix it, must fix it,' she thinks.

Kim notices the job is almost complete.

Watching Angela sleep and Chase comes up behind her, an arm around her waist, his other arm still in a sling, keeping his hand safe.

"Hey," he whispers, "Sorry that I'm late."

"It's okay, she fell asleep pretty easily."

Elaine is done with the filing of the green coded folders, and she closes the drawers. There's a key on the side of the cabinet, but Kim will have to lock it herself.

She looks over to see how she is doing.

Kim puts the last file away.

Sitting in the house and waiting for the phone to ring. I know he's going through things but it's not fair that he's pushing me away again. I want to call him but I'm angry and Angela's playing and our next door neighbor's in, I could get her to watch Angela for an hour so that I can take in a run, clear my head.

Chase is off getting therapy again and his hand needs a lot of therapy and he's been so distant and between him and dad, I just feel so alone.

A run. That will make me feel better.