agirllost | (no subject)

'I am the bud, I am the flower, be the flower, feel the sun on your petals, feel yourself opening up to the Source...' she thinks as she sits crosslegged on her bed. At the moment though, she feels more like a weed than a rose.

Other things keep interrupting her practice - thoughts about her family she can't push out of her mind, worries about the future, and most of all this sensation that she's standing at the edge of a cliff and about to jump off. But she feels, for the first time in weeks, that something will catch her if she takes that first step.

Selae was a patient teacher and she answered Kim's questions without making her feel like an idiot for asking them. Some of what her teacher said was too familiar for comfort, but she listened intently, and tried to follow along.

'I am the bud. I open up to the world, I surrender to the Source...' she thinks again, trying to clear her mind.

'I've frightened them all, I've hurt them, and I don't know how I'm going to make things right again'

She almost had Saidar and it slips away, pushing her back to the beginning of trying to clear her mind.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Mesaana shook her head. Icy blue eyes watching her carefully.

"No, he was a colleague of mine."

"Where did you work, or where do you work?"

Mesaana nodded, before answering calmly.

"I taught at the Collam Daan, a very prestigious institution for a time. Now, I do private tutoring at a school in my hometown of Mar Ruois."

"I want to be a teacher when I go back home, do you usually teach...channeling?"

Mesaana shakes her head. A calm gesture with one of her hands.

"Often not. My field is in experimental techniques in extra-dimensional spaces. Channeling is just a part of who you are, and you serve others with those abilities as the need arises."

She nods as if she understands what she's saying, but Kim's never been all that good at physics.

"So channeling helps you with that?"

Mesaana nods calmly.

"Yes, it does. I can enter Vacuoles... bubbles in the Pattern of reality, it is not that simple, of course, but it suffice for this occasion Many different experiments can be performed inside of a Vacuole."

She smiles slightly, "That sounds complicated."

A light laugh as she stepped closer to Kim.

"It often is, but you will have time to learn such things eventually."

A pause.

"Now, would you like some help with your exercises?"

Kim's thinking she's not sure she could ever learn concepts that complex.

"I would."

Mesaana glanced around the room. A smooth gesture with her hand.

"Do you have a place you prefer to sit?"

"I was sitting on my bed," she sits down on the edge.

Mesaana nods calmly. A golden glow surrounds her as a few lightning fast weaves form around her and she slowly floated up onto Kim's bed.

Sitting cross-legged after arranging her skirts, Mesaana glanced towards Kim.

"Shall we begin?"

Kim feels her mouth gape open and closes it, hoping that Selae didn't notice.

'She just flew...and I could kind of see how she did it'

She nods.

Mesaana took a deep breath. Her hands resting delicately on her knees. They had done this a number of times before now.

"The first, and possibly most difficult step is to clear your mind."

"Yeah," Kim agrees, and takes a deep breath, too, mimicking her teacher.

The other hard part is doing this with her eyes open.

'Think of nothing but the bud, see it form in my mind, small, delicate, unopened, waiting...'

Mesaana's crystalline voice slowly continued the catechism in a level, soothing tone. There was a rhythm to the way this was done. She said it exactly the same each time. The regularity helps the student.

Lady Kim may not be as eager as Lyrae Natael was, but she had time.