(no subject)
Jan. 9th, 2006 07:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
'I am the bud, I am the flower, be the flower, feel the sun on your petals, feel yourself opening up to the Source...' she thinks as she sits crosslegged on her bed. At the moment though, she feels more like a weed than a rose.
Other things keep interrupting her practice - thoughts about her family she can't push out of her mind, worries about the future, and most of all this sensation that she's standing at the edge of a cliff and about to jump off. But she feels, for the first time in weeks, that something will catch her if she takes that first step.
Selae was a patient teacher and she answered Kim's questions without making her feel like an idiot for asking them. Some of what her teacher said was too familiar for comfort, but she listened intently, and tried to follow along.
'I am the bud. I open up to the world, I surrender to the Source...' she thinks again, trying to clear her mind.
'I've frightened them all, I've hurt them, and I don't know how I'm going to make things right again'
She almost had Saidar and it slips away, pushing her back to the beginning of trying to clear her mind.
Other things keep interrupting her practice - thoughts about her family she can't push out of her mind, worries about the future, and most of all this sensation that she's standing at the edge of a cliff and about to jump off. But she feels, for the first time in weeks, that something will catch her if she takes that first step.
Selae was a patient teacher and she answered Kim's questions without making her feel like an idiot for asking them. Some of what her teacher said was too familiar for comfort, but she listened intently, and tried to follow along.
'I am the bud. I open up to the world, I surrender to the Source...' she thinks again, trying to clear her mind.
'I've frightened them all, I've hurt them, and I don't know how I'm going to make things right again'
She almost had Saidar and it slips away, pushing her back to the beginning of trying to clear her mind.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:10 am (UTC)She loves her mother and doesn't want her to be hurting.
She hesitates only a little before she knocks. "Mom?"
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:14 am (UTC)But, she'll keep trying. She realizes her concentration was interrupted not by her own thoughts, but by a knock at the door.
She walks over and opens it, feeling both awkward and guilty.
Angie looks terrible.
"Hi."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:17 am (UTC)"I'm sorry."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:21 am (UTC)"No, I'm the one who should be sorry, Angie..."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:24 am (UTC)She generally lets people walk all over her. "I didn't mean to be so angry." She sniffles.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:35 am (UTC)"Trust me, you did."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 03:38 am (UTC)"Like what?" she asks softly.
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:41 am (UTC)She hears the knock and goes to answer it, looking up at her teacher.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:45 am (UTC)"Greetings, Lady Kim."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:50 am (UTC)"Time flows differently and so I thought I best come and pay you a visit."
A pause.
"It would not do for me to neglect my student."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:54 am (UTC)"While I can enter and leave the Bar at will regardless of the Door, the timeflow is always a matter of concern."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 04:58 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-10 11:50 pm (UTC)But he has to talk to her and he isn't backing down now.
He knocks on the door.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-11 12:06 am (UTC)She opens the door, her slight smile fading as she takes in his appearance.
"Chase."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-15 03:20 am (UTC)"Kim--I'm so sorry--"
no subject
Date: 2006-01-15 03:23 am (UTC)"What are you sorry for?"
no subject
Date: 2006-01-15 03:35 am (UTC)"After I hurt you, when I lost control of the powers," he says, keeping his voice low, "I...I didn't know how to stop them from slipping and doing something like that again. And this guy named Q--omnipotent, and omniscient, he knew everything that was going on already--showed up and offered his services, and I asked him if he could get rid of my powers for me. And he did, but he said he'd have to transfer them to someone else. I tried to take them back again, but he told me it was too late, and...gave them to you. I didn't know until recently..."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-15 03:39 am (UTC)"I know, I didn't know for...a while what was happening, but I met someone and they told me and I know what's happening. And...Chase...it's okay."
"The powers are hard to control -- I almost set something on fire a few days ago. It was scary, I...wish you told me about this sooner, but, now...you've given me a gift."
no subject
Date: 2006-01-15 03:43 am (UTC)You aren't pissed-off? I've given you these powers that I used to hurt you...
...but if you use them to hurt people...if you want...
"I should have told you sooner." He swallows. "But...you're learning how to use them right? Not like I did?"
no subject
Date: 2006-01-15 03:47 am (UTC)She reaches up to touch his cheek, "I'm not angry with you. I had a really rough couple of days, but things are better now...will be better."
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From: